To be honest, I think being “quirky” is getting easier. I don’t know if it is because I am older and I just care less than I did in my teens, or if it is all the accessible (and awesome) personality tests that allow us to see and understand different sides of ourselves. But allowing my quirks to show around people I am intimidated by can still be… well, intimidating. Even if we THINK we are completely vulnerable and comfortable with ourselves… we can always take it a step further. Or maybe it is totally opposite for you and you feel like you can never fully be yourself. There’s room to grow and as always, be patient with yourself.

Be you.

Sounds easy. But is it? It can be especially hard if you are a people pleaser or go to others for confirmation to affirm who you are. I am the first to say I love a good self-help book, but we need to be aware as to why we feel we need countless opinions on happiness, a relationship expert to maintain purposeful connections, and a spiritual advisor to confirm our religious beliefs. Not saying that those are wrong to have and utilize - I have plenty of books and people in my life who fit in that category. But if you are just trying to escape the reality of who you are and fully lean on someone else’s opinion — think twice about how much weight of who you are you put in others’ hands. I have learned a great deal about life and about myself through said self-help books, but did I, at times, use them as a crutch? Most definitely. Often we already KNOW what makes us happy, what we define as fun, or how we find fulfillment.

I’d say that 9 times out of 10, things we like, do or are into are our “quirks”. However, sometimes we even convince ourselves that what other people may enjoy or like, is what we must like and enjoy. In my case, I can be pretty convincing… even to myself. I’ve talked about it before how growing up I often tried to fit the mold of a specific type of person. Whether I was trying to fit the stereotype of being an athlete (ha), yogi, bookworm, music nerd, theatre geek, tomboy — it never really worked. Even as an adult I’ve tried on a couple “personalities” and in turn, sort of ignored all the “quirks” that make me — me and make me not totally fit the “mold”. For instance, I am a huge advocate for the low/zero waste movement. After all, the negative environmental impact the meat and dairy industry has on our planet is the reason I looked into veganism to begin with. (almost 4 years vegan now)! But there are a few things within the zero waste movement that didn’t quite sit with my ACTUAL preferences… See, I had convinced myself that I did not like flowers…. Because in the zero waste movement, it is advised to have plants that can GROW in your home — that having a cut flower was a waste and not true to the movement. So, it wasn’t until Adam and I started dating and he bought me flowers and HE noticed how much I really did love having pretty flowers in my house that I was like hmmmm… maybe there is something to this. I had told him I did not LIKE cut flowers, and I only wanted potted plants. But that’s not true… potted plants freak me out. As much as I want to one day have plants… the responsibility of keeping them alive really stresses me… too much commitment.

That’s a long winded way to say — don’t lie to yourself. In the end — the truth will come out and you will have just lost out on time in life where something as simple as flowers could have brought you joy. Plus - stereotypes are dumb. Don’t let what people, culture or stereotypes stop you from letting what you truly enjoy in life bring you joy. Be brave and allow yourself to be the one that breaks the mold, be a rebel to the cause and stand out. Because I guarantee you - NOBODY really fits any mold. People may pretend or people may SEEM like they “fit"… but not a single soul fits a mold perfectly.

If you make weird alien noises, if you dance every time you eat amazing food, if you have a super dry sense of humor that most people don’t understand…. Well, lets be friends — because I just described myself and would love to meet more like-minded “weirdos”. I think we all are weirdos though, some of us just may show it publicly more than others. It’s not like I am perfect at this. Like I said, there are certain people I can think of right now that I clam up around. I am a work in progress. I try to be my true self around everyone, no matter what… but it’s not always easy. But you know what? Most people don’t care about your quirks because they have them too!

Please don’t cheat yourself out of the totally fun, awesome person that you are! I think our greatest strengths are what makes us different. I believe our different ways of thinking, interacting and being is what we should focus MOST on… not least. Try thinking about your “quirks” — what makes you different. And as a fun activity — think about what you LOVE to do and then add a quirk in the mix. You probably could come up with something totally fresh and new. Nothing is truly inventive if it isn’t unknown at one point. And isn’t that really what a quirk is? Something unknown? Something different? Something new? Just look at Marie Kondo! I am OBSESSED with her and the KonMari method (I did my whole house). But lets be real here…. This woman is an OCD neat freak. I listened to interview where I learned this was her “struggle” all her life. She was so obsessed with tidying that she would throw herself into a frenzy trying to get it just right. But that amazing woman did not let that hold her down. She let her “quirk” (and we can all agree she is cutest thing ever) become her passion, and later her career and livelihood. I mean, last night (as I am writing this) she was at the Oscars. She was all gussied up, looked amazing, and walked the red carpet all because she folds like a genius.

If there is one thing you take away from all of this — it is that your quirk(s) is likely the MOST unique and important part of who you are. It is your contribution to the world, and to hide it away would be depriving all of existence unique beauty!

Remember there is no such thing as “normal”. Therefore we live in a world of quirks. Because of this…. “Weird-ness” or “quirky-ness” cannot be measured on a sliding scale. Nobody is more or less quirky. We all just have different types of quirks and unique parts of our personality. And as much as the world needs your unique vision, YOU need it too. Being unapologetically yourself is the only true way to be happy. I guarantee that most everyone you come in contact with, WANTS you to be your unique quirky self because, in the end, it gives them the permission to do the same.